Strategies for the Cycle of Worry & Anxiety
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Worry is negative thinking which occurs when we face an anticipated or real threat. Worry is the thinking part when the heart begins racing, breathing becomes shallow and palms become sweaty.
What if I lose my job? What if my family gets Covid19? What is going to happen with the kids and school?”
Sometimes worry can help us put a plan in place-just in case. However excessive worry can be toxic.
Excessive Worry
A common belief that fuels excessive worry is the misconception that worry actually accomplishes something positive:
I want to be ready if something happens.
Excessive Worry Can Lead to Anxiety
Excessive worry can lead to anxiety and takes us out of the present moment. We no longer find joy in the moment we are in. We miss the things that are happening around us, as we ruminate about things that may or could happen that may never happen. Worry can set in motion a vicious cycle of paralysis. We are unable to problem solve and worry becomes fear which then escalates to more worry or anxiety. All of this takes an inordinate amount of energy. No wonder you feel tired and drained.
Physically, worry takes a toll on the body. It releases stress hormones, disrupts sleeping and eating patterns and compromises the immune system.
Actually, spending time anticipating the worst is exhausting, lowers our immune system and keeps us in a constant state of fight or flight which does not allow one to feel the joy or pleasure of life itself.
5 Ways to Reduce Toxic Worry and Get Ahead of Anxiety
Don’t let worry become a toxic cycle. Here are some strategies that deflate toxic worry:
Reconsider and Refocus
Do you worry about What if or What is?
Most of our excessive worry is about What if – something may happen that probably will never happen (What if a meteorite hits the earth?) Focusing energy on addressing -what is- is more realistic and may have a much more positive impact on your life.
Move Thought to Action
If we are thinking too much, ruminating about something, be your own best friend, move from thought to action.
The very move from rumination to movement can have an impact on disrupting a worry cycle.
Instead of worrying over and over about the call to your doctor to get test results – make the call. Nike’s motto, Just do it!
Instead of staying in bed worrying about what you should do today – get up, write a list and get moving on it.
Instead of worrying about being laid off, consider training or browsing for a new job on ONET or other work opportunities.
Do something different: Martial Arts, Mindfulness, meditation, exercise or prayer.
Volunteer to help others.
Gratitude- Make a list of things that you are grateful for.
Connect with Others
A powerful antidotes to excessive worry is connection to others.
Sharing lowers anxiety because it moves the worrier from internal fears to verbalized expression. Just talking about it, sharing ideas with someone can bring a new or different perspective.
You feel less alone and less vigilant and able to worry less– when someone else knows your concern and then validates and supports you.
It lightens the emotional load.
Sharing can help because being stuck in a loop of excessive worry is interrupted when someone else offers a different perspective or additional information.
Postpone Worry
Most of us do not benefit from the suggestion Stop worrying…. If we could… we would have done so already.
Dismissing the worry may not be realistic, postponing worry has proven helpful to many.
Choosing when to worry puts you in charge. It gives you the psychological space and time to do something else or think of something else. This brings down the anxiety and often affords a more realistic appraisal when you do think about it.
Many people worry at night when they are most exhausted, their defenses are down, they feel overwhelmed and nothing seems possible. Many find that postponing worry until morning is invaluable. (Some write it down—so they move it from mind to paper).
In the light of day many find that both the cause for worry and the need for solutions has dramatically changed.
Set up a “worry time”
In the face of worry that just won’t stop, we recommend a continual plan of systematic postponement and a designated “ worry time” to disrupt and dilute the pattern.
Once you postpone your worry, it is helpful “to do” something else. Very often time spent in other activities begins to occupy your attention and reduce your anxiety. It is sometimes a surprise to the worrier that they have become so engrossed in a new positive activity — they forgot to worry.
Changing Our Inner Dialogue
Fueling the loop of worry is often the voice of a vulnerable or traumatized self that does not remember personal strengths and accomplishments.
Many of us at some point get can get trapped enough in worry to ask:
“What would I do?” “What if my decision is wrong?” “ How will it turn out?”“ Should I be doing more to help?”
Consciously challenging a frightened inner dialogue by thinking about the story of your life and connecting with a stronger surviving self can re-enforce a positive perspective and change the dialogue. Recognizing your strength and power in the situations you have trans versed can remind you that you have the resilience to get through this also.
Consider the power of these internal statements on reducing excessive worry:
I can change my mind if it doesn’t work
I always find a way – even when things get difficult.
I don’t need the answer now.
When I need to deal with it – I will.
For now, all I have to take….. is the step that is in front of me.
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